Jobs. Musing on how I really did have one, once.
Employment.
Our daughter is so driven by the idea of making money that everyday she begs for me to take her down to the local candy maker to convince him that she would be an excellent employee. He has gracious told her that she is too young at present, but she is resolute that with a uniform, broom and Windex she could convince him of her indispensability.
She will never have problems making money.
Her mother on the other hand, well….
Linking up with Monday Listicles, (On Tuesday, go figure.)
I can’t think of ten jobs that I actually was paid for. I’ve worked lots but getting money has seemed to be the problem. What is the scripture?…”Ask and ye shall receive.”
In no particular order….
1. Raft rental girl.
This meant renting rafts (obviously).
When not renting rafts, we cleaned bathrooms. Minimum wage for wearing bathing suit to be vomited on. (Wave pool made people sick.) We cleaned bowel movements and used tampons out of shower stalls. And I so wish that was an overstatement.
Shining moment of summer was rescuing a poor mouse trapped in the women’s locker room with my broom and dust bucket.
2. Law clerk.
Not much money either. Drafted complaints and memorandums.
Shining moment of summer was tracking down a deadbeat Dad at his job as a cook in downtown restaurant. He coughed up a medical insurance card. Never forget the look of gratitude from the mother when I handed her the card. “Now I can take him to the doctor for his ear infection,” was her comment.
3. Sold T-shirts in kiosk at Mall.
The one emblazoned with Bad Attitude University was our top seller. Nuff said.
4. Patient transportation at Regional Medical Center.
I did this a few summers. We transported the live patients and dead ones.
Interviewing a detective for an article recently, she stated you can’t be squeamish when finding a body that’s in state of decomposition. I know what they look like and smell like after two weeks in a car standing in the Florida sun. The hospital was landing pad for all criminal autopsies. (Okay, a little bile just crept up back of throat.)
5. Ran Georgia Office of Company providing Bar Review course.
This wasn’t mixology lab. (Darn the luck.) Twice a year, we ran a six-week course for students taking the Bar Exam so they could be licensed as lawyers. Nothing really to say about this…other than I enjoyed it. Law students as a rule are pretty normal folks. (That might surprise some for you.)
That’s about all the paying things I’ve done…..
Oh yeah.
6. Freelance writing.
I found out if you can write in a reasonably entertaining and coherent manner people will pay you. And though it’s sometimes hard to put my rear in a chair long enough to hack out a first draft — I do love it. And am grateful to be paid for such.
What about you?
Any bizarre, boring or entertaining jobs out there?
You are funny, no doubt. And had some weird jobs. I always wonder about all those coroners and agents in shows wearing Gucci over a dead body. I mean you don’t see chefs wearing it while frying food. Dead people are messy and stinky business right?!
Since I started doing my own thing I find it so hard to “monetize” my work. That word to begin with is annoying. So I am so glad you charge for your freelance writing. I get a customer, do a photo session and then feel bad taking the check. SO stupid…
It’s more do as I say…than do as I feel, Stasha. I’m 100 percent for working hard for little or no money to break into to a field or to get noticed, but there comes a point when you are expending a lot of creative energy and producing something people want —-you need to say “I am a writer.” “I am a photographer.” “I am an artist.” And my efforts are more-than-worthy of compensation.
And yes, the smell of certain bodies can be overpowering. (The dead ones especially.) I don’t know how people can do it. Wonder what they make?
Your title cracked me up…it’s been 16 years since I’ve been paid to do something.
Your experiences really have run the gamut. The cleaning showers one sounds like the worst of the bunch 😛
Cleaning bathrooms and dealing with the used tampons sounds gross. Poor you!
You’ve had some interesting jobs over the years, haven’t you? I couldn’t help but laugh while reading your list. Funny girl 🙂
Ugh…I’m trying not to imagine the shower area that people obviously used as their own personal sewage system/trashcan. EWW. Don’t people have any decency?! (I sound old now…but it’s gross!)
Also, that’s awesome that you get paid to do freelance writing. Go, you!
I know, Greta. We used to say, “What must these people’s home look like?” But it was Orlando, a high traffic tourist area and honestly, I got to thinking that if it wasn’t their mess to clean up… people just act CRAZY.
Oh my. I have as you know had a lot of strange jobs in my time but the picking up of and transporting dead/decomposing bodies is not one I would excel at.
As you said: I’m pretty clear I lack that particular skill set!
Oh my, you have had some interesting, and also really awful, jobs.
Mainly, I can totally see how you get paid to write. You are so enjoyable to read.
So many interesting and different jobs you have done! I thought a law clerk would make more though 🙂
I got paid something, Audrey — but not that much. Can’t remember, it’s been a while. oops.