I was doing fine. Then came the birthday.
He’s been gone a little over a month.
My oldest.
First one away at college.
I was down a bit. But starting to do better.
The came today. His birthday.
And I was surprised by how emotional I got this morning.
Even typing that I feel silly, embarrassed. Nothing has happened to him. In fact it’s all great. He’s away at a wonderful school. Enjoying his classes. Meeting interesting people. Having new experiences.
But the birthday flag sits in a corner and not out on the porch like it has on September 7 for so many years.
He didn’t tell anyone it was his birthday. Just like his father never did.
One year with a new job as a young law associate, I asked my newish hubby if he was going to tell anyone it was his birthday.
“No way. I don’t want anyone to know.”
Okay, if that’s the way he wanted it, I didn’t call a single co-worker. I certainly didn’t text them or even e-mail. No back then, I would have had to actually talk to someone on a corded phone.
His birthday came and he went to work. I called him in the middle of the day. “How’s it going?”
“No one knows it’s my birthday.”
Of course no one knows it’s your birthday. You didn’t tell them.
So this is a text I sent to a friend this morning. A friend whose daughter is a freshman at the same college.
It’s hard to not worry if you baby is having a good 19th birthday.
Of course it will be better if his friends know.
She will tell them, won’t she…and they will do something?
UGH.
